There is a quote I have seen upon many a Pinterest board, categorized underneath headers with labels like, “words to live by,” and “truths.” This particular quote is one that I will admit sits in a position on one of my boards, one that I tapped, hit “save pin” and added to my board in one of many trips to this particular site, an article I have even shared as a graphic once on my Facebook wall.
But now I understand the true meaning of these words.
The quote reads, “The lesson repeats as needed”. At the time I saved this quote to my board, I liked the way it sounded. But in perspective, I didn’t think about the words. What did this actually mean?
In recent weeks, I have encountered circumstances that have repeated. The parties involved differed each time, but the situation was the same. Surely, there was a reason for this. It was not a coincidence that I was experiencing the same thing twice.
I have had to sever ties with people I never imagined would exit my life, much less by their own discretion. I would never have imagined that for my well being, for my personal and mental health, the best thing to do would be to end relationships that were toxic.
Toxic relationships, and friendships, do not always appear this way from the outside. There are no defining characteristics to tell you that a person will not be ideal for you. If everyone came with warning labels, hurt could easily be avoided. Unfortunately, life does not operate that way, and we discover the lesson the hard way. It has been said before, that experience is the cruelest of teachers, providing us with a test before the lesson has ever been taught, and I absolutely believe this is true. We thrive on emotion because we are meant to feel, even if in doing so, we break our own hearts by returning to something that we know is wrong for us.
And now, it makes sense. The lesson, does in fact, repeat as needed. To better oneself, to truly make them appreciate the blessings they are equipped with, we sometimes need reminders of everything we don’t need. Our hearts may long for something, but ultimately it may cause more harm than good, and for this reason we have to let things go.
Friendships will dissolve, but we will go on. We will create new friendships, and if we are fortunate enough to become truly comfortable with ourselves and our own company, we can be our own best friends as well.
Relationships will move forward too. The person that we thought we may spend the rest of our life with may not be the right person for us as we all grow and change. It is our decision to decide if we want to grow together or grow apart.
We will grow too, and we will keep learning, through the lesson, how strong we truly are. It will hurt, it will feel raw and emotional, and we may even break our own spirits and souls in the journey to becoming who we are, but it is far better to live a life that we can be happy with than to keep people in it who will make us regret who we are.